How can I learn how to center myself when self centering is understood as self centeredness and gets translated into arrogance? It becomes over confidence; it is seen as too much. “Too much”. How often is anything women do, black women in particular, dumped into the category of being “too much”? Too loud, too quiet, too much makeup, too little makeup, too much of this, too little of that, “too” of something no matter what we do.
So if I center myself, if I take the extra time to look at myself in the mirror and genuinely admire what I see, if I take the time to indulge in myself and in the things that I love, if I pause to appreciate me, is that “too much”? Am I doing “too much”? It seems as if I haven’t been doing enough. I haven’t cared for myself enough, because someone else or something else always seemed to be the focus. Something else was always my center.
So if I put me back at the center, when does the too little, become too much?
Nia E. Sanders 